well.. i want to dedicate this song to my dearest and most wonderful person who has touched my life in the past few months.. just want to say... these words.....

Artist: Natasha Bedingfield
Album: Unknown
Title: These Words

Threw some chords together
The combination D-E-F
Is who I am, is what I do
No one’s gonna let it down for you
Try to focus my attention
But I feel so A-D-D
I need some help, some inspiration
(But it’s not coming easily)
Whoah oh…

Trying to find the magic
Trying to write a classic
Don’t you know, don’t you know, don’t you know?
Waste-bin full of paper
Clever rhymes, see you later

These words are my own
From my heart flown
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There’s no other way
To better say
I love you, I love you…

Written by Ricelli and Keys
Resided in over a heartbeat
I’m having trouble saying what I mean
With dead poets and drum machines
I know I had some studio time, but
But I couldn’t find a killer hook
Now you’re gonna raise the bar right up
Nothing I write is ever good enough

These words are my own
From my heart flown
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There’s no other way
To better say
I love you, I love you…

I’m getting off my stage
The curtains pull away
No hyper bowl to hide behind
I’m naked, so exposed
Whoah.. oh.. oh.. oh.. Whoah.. oh..

Trying to find the magic
Trying to write a classic
Waste-bin full of paper
Clever rhymes, see you later

These words are my own
From my heart flown
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you
There’s no other way
To better say
I love you…
I love you, is that okay…?

so you see darling... no matter what i write in my sms, or here, all i want to say is i love you... and i do... *muacks*

wahh.. yesterday was tiring.. haha.. it was supposed to be just a simple, and nice datee with noorhana. hahaha.. this is how it went...

in the morning, i went to SIM.. again. *laughs* yeah, it's great to crash lectures in SIM. *smiles* i sat through the whole lecture.. yeah.. listening to the lecturer, then do my own stuff, play games on hp and all stuffs to keep me entertained.. hahaha. den during break, my primary school friend waved at me.. haha.. of cos i waved back la! and smiled and she came to us.. and said hi.. haha.. and even said hi to sayang.. khekhe.. as she left, sayang said "dun do that!" wahhaha.. and i went.. "jealous jealous jealous jealous *fades*" khekhekhe.. and she hit me.. ;)
oh.. haha.. and she took for me coffee during break.. hehe.. so sweet.. :P yeah.. they served coffee/tea and otah bun/malay kuih ... she asked me to get her the kuih.. cos i wanted to get the food.. haha.. den i told her, the kuih's name is kuih bau.. she dun believe.. wahaha.. until she smelt it.. khekhke.. it's this ... green coloured kuih la... haha... yeah.. of cos she didnt finish it...

after school, we went to.... botanical gardens! hahaha.. my first trip to the botanical gardens.. *yeah.. sad sad farhan.. haha..* was impressed that singapore has that kind of standard for a garden.. khekehkhe.. and i tot only overseas has that kind of landscape... =P we took photos of the plants.. trees... and a spastic girl... wahahhaha!! okie okie.. it's like this. the girl was feeding the fishes... sounds innocent enough...? well.. the way she feeds them is that she took a small piece of the bread, and SLAM it to the water.. wahahha!!! and without stopping, she's throwing.. i mean.. SMASHING the water as if she's angry.. haha.. den when she got bored of the fishes, she AIMED and hit the birds with bread... wahahhaha!! spasm... and there was this innocent duck.. that swam cos it saw the bread... and she threw it and hit the head of the duck.. and the duck went "aper ni...?" wahhahaha!!!! ask hana for the movie clip.. hehehe.. yeah.. so we practically sit around and enjoy the serenity and scenery... we left around 1440 to travel to royal plaza at the scotts... hahaha.. we wanted to go to little india for some indian cuisine.. hehe.. tosai masala... yepz.. and out of the blue, the brother wanted to tag along with us... wahhaha!!

so we waited for him at borders.. looked at some interesting books.. and i think i might buy some.. wahahha... we then took the bus, which we took a long time to find, that will take us to little india.. haha.. once there, ALL of us ate tosai masala... *is that how it's spelt?* hehehe.. yeah.. at first taste, man.. it was wonderful! wahahha.. den i decided to have another serving.. it's only $1.80! haha.. and i asked someone to eat with me.. khekhke.. and yeah.. her brother decided to get one for himself too.. khekhekhe.. i tot the taste will be as wonderful.. but then... it turns to be rather watery.. eeww.. and i felt like vomitting.. haha.. and it tasted sourish too... khekhekhekhe... ah well...

after that... we went for prayers.. and took the bus off to yishun.. cos there's no direct bus to woodlands... hehe.. the brother took out a deck of cards.. supposedly wanted to play daidee.. but then ended up showing me some of his magic tricks... *impressive* and his tricks are better than khairul faliq's... wahhahaha!! definitely! and i decided to show mine too.. and.. of cos i forgot how to do it.. wahhahaha.. so it didnt work.. :P at yishun.. we went for prayers again... and took the bus to woodlands interchange... hahahaha.. chill at mcdonalds.. playing daidee (one round), bluff (one round) and ended up showing tricks all over again.. wahahhaha! and of cos i practised mine... and it worked this time round!! wahhaha...

all in all... it was a tiring day.. yeah.. and i was too tired to even update last night.. khekhekhe.. so i did it today... uhhu... so yeah la.. that was a day spent with sayang and her brother...... :)

medical FFI was today. it's one of the prerequisites before going overseas. they want you to be in tip-top medical health before allowing you to get posted overseas for a year. yes.. overseas posting.... for a year..
the medical officer didnt find anything wrong with me.. and declared me to be FIT for OVERSEAS POSTING. a part of me said.. yaay!!!! i'm going to go!! and another part of me said... i have lots to do before going... hhahaha...

ehem.. so now i'm waiting for the interview to be done... and then the announcement of the posting to which overseas camp... there's a high possibility that i'm going to BRUNEI with hafiz.. hahaha..
it's weird that we got selected...
my reason when i applied was cos i wanted to help my family financially... and hafiz's reason was because he's staying at home alone.. wahhahah!!!
oh.. hafiz still has to remove his wisdom tooth before he goes to brunei.. yeah.. and it'll be in alexandra hospital.. khekhekhe.. hopefully we both get to go together.. khkekhe..

and to my sayang...
dun worry too much.. hehe.. there's a high possibility that i'm going off in january.. hahaha.. but most probably will be before my birthday.. yeah.. i dunno.. we'll just wait and see after the interview... for the time being, i just wanna spend more time with you.. and my family before i go.. haha.. 1 year sehhh.. ish.. but yah lah... after that one year is over, my bank account will be 10k richer... waaahahhahahaha..... so cool.. i like.. :P

to all of u... yeah.. still can call me if u people want.. haha.. at brunei, cant call home as often.. yeah.. and i've decided to stay at home instead of camp.. hahaha.. i'll lose my sanity there... really...

that's all.. signing off...

Sometimes... I think about the first time I realised that I love you...
It was as if my eyes took a picture at that moment...
and stored it in my heart...

Sometimes I think about how much my life has changed because of YOU...
I think about you and your happiness...
about us....
and our life together.....

And I realised that you are as much a part of me now as the air I breathe and the dreams I nurture....

But from time to time...
I still like to remember..
the first time...
I looked into your eyes....
and saw our future there....

harlowwwww people! haha i'm in camp.. updating.. as usual..
it;s not so bad.. haha.. got tv and computer! wuuhoo!
okie la.. that's all .. i guess.. cant think ...
cos talking to hana.. hehehe..

soo... tata!

wahahha.. this is.. erm.. the "sick" poses... wahahaha.. good thing i wasnt involved.. *innocent look* *senses someone's shocked looking at the guys* hehehe...
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this is my platoon.. yeah! i love them!!! wahahaha... compared to BMT, post-bmt life is much much much more enjoyable for me... yeah... no racist bastards...
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yeah... OETI's graduation day... see if u can spot me... wahhahaha!
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i missed her so much.. so i decided to say this to her...

Happiness lives for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried, for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives. Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss and ends with a tear. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past, you can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

it's harder to juggle work, play and relationship at the same time... hahaha..
another week has passed.. and this has been the longest week i've had in months..

the day after my last entry, i had guard duty. it's like, i just got posted there on friday and i had duty on sunday... *shakes head* and sunday duties are unlike weekday duties... the camp is huge.. definitely.. took 2 hours to complete the whole camp compound prowling. and by then, your leg hurts like as if the joints came off...
to make matters worse, duty rest after yesterday's duty is only 2 hours.. from 8 to 10 supposedly... but then, on monday, you found yourself being held back because they had problems with the checkpoints registers... and they held you till 0900 and make u do stupid work called area cleaning. the windows were thick with dust and we had to clean it... *shakes head*
so on that monday, i didnt have sleep for the day.. cos by the time we finish showering, it was 0940... and we didnt do anything either on that day.. but then, i stole a few hours of sleep in front of their office cos i just dun care anymore... i was glad i went home on monday night... and as usual, i went to meet sayang before going home.. hahaha..

tuesday came... it was duty day again .. for me... urgh.. and i tot since i knew the duty better, i'll get the time slot that i want... but apparently, out of all the guards there, only 3 were trained in weapons... i was like... "are they so stupid that they can't even go for rifle range...?" it was irritating.. cos firstly, the sentries have to be weapon trained... and since there are 3 slots, you know where this is going... then for prowlers, they must have 1 weapon trained prowler for each detail... and cos of these untrained people, me and my friend got different duties... i choose prowler... den was pushed to sentry... and then pushed again to the earliest sentry... which means, i do 1 extra duty for that day compared to others...
my friend didnt really know what was expected for prowler.. and he went with an untrained arms guy.... and he got 2 extra duties for spending too long between checkpoints..
wednesday, we were released from the guardroom at 0830hours.. it wasnt so bad.. at least, got an hour to sleep before we shower... and still no work to do... spent the day sleeping at times..
think i met sayang on wednesday too....

thursday was a little better... we got into sections and start to know the old guys... i decided to stay in-camp cos we had OC parade on friday.. and we had to report by 0720 latest... and i cant reach there at that time....it was another long long night in camp...
yesterday's parade was shitty.. but then again, which parade wasnt... the inspection took half and hour to complete.. and we had to stand unmoving... then there was a "motivation" talk to encourage us to give our 101% for the company... *shakes head in disgust* and then i had to sit through another induction program on safety and discipline... ah.. rite.. and that all ended at 0940... managed to go for break at 1000... den we cut oil basins using hammer and chisel and screwdriver.... *smacks forehead*
and at the end of the day, i met her again.. hahaha..

will meet her again today... for movie..
i started to come down with flu... and the block nose sucks.....

have to stay in camp tomorrow night so that i wont be late on monday. it's CO parade... and as usual, report before 0720...

sometimes i begin to wonder... does going by the books makes you suffer more than going against it... *shrugs* i'll never know....

hopefully, next week will get better... as in.. the week will go faster a little ...

*STRESSED* hahaha.. yeah.. that's cos i have lots of updating to do.. khekheke...

firstly, i'm out of OETI.. yaay! so now i'm a qualified and trained technician! wuhoo! haha.. we got this beautiful certificate that is recognised outside army. yeah. it's a skill... i like~ besides the cert, we got our platoon photo that we took during one of the weekdays.. hehehe.. so, officially, on the 9th of september, i passed out of OETI and was transferred to my new unit....

on the 10th, i went to my new unit. 9 dsmb (direct support and maintenance battalion)... it's situated in changi... and most of us stay in the west... urghhhh... the hassle... it's like, we take 2 hours just to get there... and there's only one bus from one place... like from tampines, only bus 29.. bedok, bus 2.. and pasir ris, bus 89... *shakes head* luckily there's a shuttle service provided.... yeah.. should make use of it and reduce on my concession fare... currently i'm using the bus concession.. which is unlimited ride for 61 dollars... but the mrt concession will cost 50 dollars... and only 4 rides per day... which will be a total of 111 dollars per month! and there's no pay rise... *thanks ah akbar*

i'm not officially a corporal yet.. but the rank will come, together with the pay...

yeah, so that's my unit for the time being... cos....

i'm posted to overseas....

my new camp will be in brunei. i'm still waiting for the chief clerk to send me my letter for medical checkup. so as long as i dun fail the medical checkup, it's confirmed that i'm going... it'll be for a year minimum.. and i can choose to extend the duration if i feel i want to.. but the thing is that, i have to stay for 6 months there before i'm allowed to return back to singapore using my leave...

i want to celebrate hari raya with sayang this year....

i want to be here for her birthday....

sigh.. oh well, i've always said that things happen for a reason... i hate going to jc.. but i was there... and the reason was to find my other half.... *insyaallah* think i found her..khekkhekhe...

yeah.. some of you might have known about this... but just wanna say that there are internet access over there in brunei.. i'll try my best to update from there .. hehe.. must be a great experience... though part of my heart will always remain here with someone......

the earliest i'll leave will be this month.... i dunno yet.. i'll keep everyone informed...
so till then, keep telling the ones you love how much they mean to u.. cos you'll never know when they'll leave u.....

Artist: Westlife
Album: Coast to Coast
Title: I Lay My Love On You

Just a smile and the rain is gone
Can hardly believe it (yeah)
There's an angel standing next to me
Reaching for my heart

Just a smile and there's no way back
Can hardly believe it (yeah)
But there's an angel, she's calling me
Reaching for my heart

I know, that I'll be ok now
This time it's real

I lay my love on you
It's all I wanna do
Everytime I breathe
I feel brand new

You open up my heart
Show me all your love, and walk right through
As I lay my love on you

I was lost in a lonely place
Could hardly believe it (yeah)
Holding on to yesterdays
Far, far too long

Now I believe its ok cause
this time it's real

I lay my love on you
It's all I wanna do
Everytime I breathe I feel brand new
You open up my heart
Show me all your love, and walk right through
As I lay my love on you

I never knew that love could feel so good
Like once in a lifetime
You changed my world

I lay my love on you
You make me feel brand new
Show me your love, and walk right through
As I lay my love on you

I lay my love on you
It's all I wanna do
Everytime I breathe I feel brand new
You open up my heart
Show me all your love, and walk right through
As I lay my love on you

a whole dayof yesterday spent with sayang again... *chuckles* the time spent : from 0745 to 0845 then 1230 to 2015... yeah~

it started with me "accidentally" dropped by her house early in the morning. hahaha. i reached there around 0730am.. hehe cos i know she'll be leaving her house at 0745. *thanks to my ingenius way of asking her* hahahaha. and she didnt suspect a thing till yesterday morning when i asked "do you like surprises?" *smiles* so i accompanied her(in my army uniform and triangular hair) to clementi mrt station. hehe...

then it was the army open house. we're supposed to meet at the entrance of the place by 0930.. and 5 people were late.. including the ic. so i took over the role and marked the attendance. we stayed at the entrance till almost 10am and it was freaking hot and stuffy and humid. so, i got the attendance ready and wanted to cover for my friends who were late.. and so i asked the officer in-charge if we're to take attendance again later after the whole thing. and of cos, he had to give a i-dont-give-a-damn face and said "i've briefed the ic yesterday" so i said, " i'm not the ic that you briefed yesterday" and he said " fuck the ic" wah lau.. early in the morning, and i got fucked for no apparent reason. wonderful wonderful. of cos i got pissed la.. and i took the attendance again, and my platoon mates wanted to know if we're to take attendance again. and of cos as the ic, i went to ask him again.. and the same thing happened again. i mean, i dun even know what to do there, where we're supposed to go and stuff.. so i asked... and this is what we get for asking in the organisation.. den he really reached my limit... after he said "fuck the ic" den i raised my voice " WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THEN? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT U WANT" yeah... chargable offence... but if the commander doesnt give a proper instruction, how are the men going to follow properly....? we dun even know what to do... i reported to him the attendance, and he pulled me to one side nicely... *laughs* and he said " i dun like the way u talk to me just now. "
"sorry sir, but i dun know what to do, and that's y i asked u."
"i don't care what you do. just give me the attendance then i'll tell you. i've been here since early morning just to get the attendance ready. all i want is the attendance and what u do is your problem."
(in my mind) i was here before u arrived... heh
"yes sir. sorry sir."
(in my mind) if he had said that earlier it would have been easier. and all he said was fuck the ic. wth...

so it's over la.. as in, the whole tense moment... i said sorry, he's happy.. everyone's happy... hah..

a few minutes later.. we left the area... waited for 30 minutes for the bus.. wahhahahahha.. bad bad day... we reached the interchange at 1045.. and of cos we decided to get a drink first before going home. so we walked around and around till 1100 before we get our drink.. and that's not even cold.. *shakes head* i got into the bus at 1108... and reached home at 1150.... showered and changed in 10 minutes... and left the house to meet her all over again!

hahaha.. and so, met her at the bus stop of SIM. her eye's still red from the overdue contacts. good thing she wore specs yesterday.... yah, nak i suruh baru buat.. *grins* *sidetrack* i love you *back to story* and we travel to clementi before getting on another bus to orchard. apparently, my mum was behind us at the clementi's bus stop.. wahhahahahah! i was like.. "asal tak tegur" (why didnt say hi) cos she smsed me la.. yeah..

hehe... it was fiza's birthday gathering.. so we had to be there at 3.. and we reached orchard at 1330. sat at mcdonalds for a while, head down to borders until 0240 and went royal plaza at scotts for prayers. hehehe... the whole gathering was cool.. it's at constant cravings and 9 of us were there, including fiza. hahaha... i had an embarrasing moment of asking a sprite on the left.. wahhaha.. like fiza said "not as if the sprite on the left is any different from the sprite on the right" err yeah.. haha.. it happens la.. hahaha... embarrasing moments.. hiakz! doesnt really matter.... took lots of photos.. haha.. photos of food, of sprite, of people, of me, of her.. hahaha...

accompanied sayang to her cousin's house after that. and the bus took a long long long long long long time to reach jurong east. hahaha.. and i fell asleep during some parts of the journey.. heh! she was feeling tired.. tired from the whole week of studying and tuition and all ... and she still have wedding to attend today.. so.. yeah.. that's how tired she'll be.. all drained..

yeah. that's all i have for yesterday....

*you*
the times we spent, the times we're together,
the times i'm with you, i'll always treasure...
till the day comes for us to be one,
to be legally recognised as a couple,
i'll always be by your side...
caring, loving, smiling, helping...
and make everyday of your day a better day....
i love you darling...

signing off...
your humble prince *wahhaha oxymoron*
Farhan Suhada

she was only half asleep throughout the whole night.
said that her arm hurts.
massaged it herself.
wonders why it hurts.
thought it's probably the aircon.

army open house on saturday. i think even civilians can go there. but.. but.. sayang got lesson.. so.. she can't go for it... *smiles*

theory test in a few more hours.... *shrugs* just do what i have to do.. hehe.. 50 mcq questions for dunno how long.. probably 2 hours... *nods head* so.. till later!

*whispers* i like my desktop pic... hahahaha!

yeah.. just got back from woodland's library's mcdonald's. of cos, i was there to meet her la. hehe.. as usual, she looks sooooo sweet!!! must be the baju kurung.. no wait.. she IS SWEET! hahaha.. it's just her~ but i'm biased ... hahahaha! *pauses* DONT CARE!

*laughs* so yeah.. she was studying. i returned her book to her.. the paul jenning's uncanny... i just cant find the time to read them... cos most of the time i have after work, is either spent with her.. or spent with her.. hahahha! but it's my choice what! though i can choose to stay home.. and rest.. hehehehe! yepz... just as i got seated, ezeikel suddenly popped up of nowhere and said hi to us... i was like... " *shudders* " hahaha.. seriously, i didnt expect ezeikel to be there la... haha.. and she was smirking and grinning and smiling when she sees us together.. hahaha.. aper sajer kel... i wonder why she's so fascinated with us.. hahaha! *are we on some.. farhan's show or hana's show or something?!* heh..

hahaha.. 2 more weeks to posting out... and tmrw's the theory test... fine fine.. hahaha.. followed by photo taking.. hahaha.. and friday's the practical tests... so... yah.. and i heard that we are already posted to our units... except that we're not informed of it.. cos they dun want us to be complacent and not do the test properly... *shakes fists* and i bet i was given this vocation even before i got enlisted... heh...

okie gd nite! miss you sayang~